HEADLINES

Blind Date? :
The NY Post reported that this weekend New York Governor David Paterson was spotted having a romantic date at a New Jersey restaurant with a woman who was not his wife. Paterson responded by saying, he's not seeing anyone.

The Hippo of the Senate :
The senate race in Massachusetts to fill Ted Kennedy's seat is much closer than most Democrats had expected, and many are projecting Republican Scott Brown as the victor - though let's face it, it'll probably take at least both of these guys to fill Teddy's plus size seat.

The Old Man and the Football :
Yesterday 40 year old Brett Favre led the Minnesota Vikings past the Dallas Cowboys and into the NFC Championship game. They say if you listened closely enough, you could hear John Madden getting an erection.

Los Presidentes :
Former Presidents Bill Clinton and George W. Bush taped a commercial this weekend in an attempt to raise funds for Haiti following last week's devastating earthquake. The commercial was going great till Bush announced, "The first 100 callers will get a free ShamWow!"